Kelly Link, at Clarion, recommended that I try to come up with advertisements for my bee story, a flier of some sort that the visitors to Crucialis receive upon “landing” on the floating village. For those that have the inclination, I'm looking for feedback on what I've come up with.
The seven ads are meant to come from people with a Puritan mindset ca. 1600. I've modeled them off of Victorian London ads, hoping the old feel is enough to convince someone that they're still authentic for a slightly older era.
Can you find any anachronisms? Do they give a flavor for the world/village in which the story is set? (It's not necessary to read the story. I'm only looking for what sort of vibe these ads give the reader.) Does it give you any indication of their way of life? Their religious views? I don't want to be heavy handed about that stuff, but I do want it to come through. Are these goods reasonable for a village that is essentially floating on the sea?
Thanks for any thoughts.
Fresh and Smoked Fish, Whale Meat
Spermaceti Lamp Oil, Whalebone Stays
Many more products of the sea.
Hook and Net, Outer Ring, Docks Central
“Brighten those boots, man!”
“I've tried, sir, but the shine never lasts.”
“Then get you to Carver's Sundries!”
Fine Boot and Leather Polish Made from the Purest Beeswax
Candles, Honey, Flax Thread, Slumgum Firestarter
Carver's Honey & Sundries, Inner Ring, SSW
“Father, is your shoulder still terribly sore?”
“No, son, not since I used Alycine's Ambergris Linament!”
Harvested from Right Whales, the Inland Sea’s best source for Unadulterated Ambergris
Alycine Medical Remedies, Inner Ring, NNE between Trailway Toys and the Visitors' Church
The Guiding Light Hotel Awaits with Open Arms
Private Apartments (en suite.)
Elegantly Furnished Drawing Room
Holy Studies Held Nightly in the Reading Room
Outer Ring, 500 Yards CCW from the Docks
WARM and COLD HERBED and SALTED Baths
Lateral, Ascending and Vertical WARM and COLD SHOWERS
VAPOUR and ORDINARY HOT BATHS as usual
SHAMPOOING, Shaves, and Haircuts Given
Purity Bath & Barber, Outer Ring, Due West, Adjoining the Guiding Light Hotel
“This Quilt is so soft, and Beautiful too! Wherever did you get it?”
“Crucialis Quilts, of course!”
Crucialis Quilts has the Finest selection of Quilts
The Inland Sea has to Offer
You May Find Us on the Inner Ring, East-Northeast
You May Come with Heavy Heart
But Leave With Shoulders Eased
Let Us Share Your Burden
Absolutions Given Daily at the Crucialis Visitors Church
Due North on the Outer Ring, CW from the Docks
Open Sunup to Sundown